Beginnings

“Every day is a new beginning. Treat it that way. Stay away from what might have been, and look at what can be.” – Marsha Petrie Sue

A new day begins on the shore of Lake Superior

The quote above fits our lives perfectly right now. As you can gather from my last post, we take things day by day around here. Some days are great and others are downright brutal. It can be easy to get caught up in the what might have beens during the difficult times, especially when you are parenting children from difficult pasts.

So, let’s talk about beginnings. Today I am beginning something new on the blog. As you will notice on the side of my blog, I’ve decided to join in on the NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month) fun. That means I will be posting daily during the month of January and the common theme weaving through my posts will be beginnings. I’m hoping to get the creative juices flowing. I love to write but with life being hectic and hurried, I need some inspiration from time to time. So here we go. I know, I know, I’m already a few days behind. Better late than never, right?!

***

As I was just sitting down to write this post, something spectacular occurred and it’s too good not to share. Both boys were asleep in bed when I heard it….

“Mommy!”

My heart thumped heavily in my chest. My mouth gaped open and I sprinted into the boys’ room. My stomach had butterflies. I knew exactly which son had yelled out for me. I picked him up and gently placed him back into the bed he had rolled out of. I rubbed his back as he drifted off to sleep again and I quietly wiped the tears from my eyes.  My heart swelled and I felt the edges of my lips curl into a huge grin.

It was Big Brother.

And it was the first time he has ever called out for me in the night. On January 14th we will celebrate one year together as a family….one year since we stepped off of a plane with a very scared four year-old boy. And tonight something wonderful transpired in our home–something I honestly thought would never happen. I had just decided to get a video monitor to put in the boys’ room since Big Brother never cries out (or even leaves the bed) when he is distressed. I usually sleep in the room with him or check on him every couple of hours. But tonight, I was delighted to find that my son had actually called out for me in his half-conscious sleepy state.

Our little boy is starting to trust….to love…to want us. All the hard work, all the doubt, all the tears triumphs and fears over the past year have led us to this moment. Even as I rocked him and kissed him goodnight at bedtime, he had spontaneously repeated the phrase he’s heard from me no less than 5 million times, “family forever.” He loves to repeat phrases without understanding their meanings, but I think he actually gets this one.

No, I’m sure he gets it.

It is the beginning of something wonderful. I am looking at what can be and it is breathtaking.

I love a good beginning, don’t you?

5 thoughts on “Beginnings

  1. Amy

    This is wonderful Lauren! I’m sorry I’ve been such a bad commentor lately, my computer has been on the fritz and even though I read your blog on my phone, I can’t comment on it. Anyway, I have been reading each one of your posts and just know that you are not far from my thoughts and prayers. Happy (almost) one year anniversary!

    xoxo,
    Amy

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